Chinese Dating

Published on September 25th, 2014 | by Veryflirt

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Top Chinese Dating Sites – How Western Men can Meet Chinese Woman Online

Chinese women are beautiful, but their appeal goes well beyond that. Many Western men are attracted to Chinese women for their intelligence, grace, loyalty and many other wonderful qualities. Actually meeting a woman in China, especially for a man living in the U.S. or elsewhere in the Western world, can seem like a challenge, but it’s actually relatively easy.

Chinese Dating for Westerners

Chinese women are irresistible to men from all over the world. Forming a relationship with a Chinese woman can be complex, however – especially if you don’t live in China or speak Mandarin. Fortunately, we’re here to help. With a little bit of knowledge and preparation, your experiences with Chinese romance will be successful and rewarding. You might even find true love!

Where to Meet Chinese Women

Online is the best method to initially meet Chinese women, especially if you live in a Western country. You want to stay away from general dating sites, such as Match.com or eHarmony. Rather, your chances for finding a meaningful relationship improve drastically if you use a site which caters specifically to Asian women who are looking to meet Western men.

There are three popular sites we recommend:

1. ChinaLoveCupid.com

Also known at ChineseLoveLinks.com, this is another popular option. This site is run by the Cupid Media network of dating sites. We’ve had great success with other sites run by Cupid Media, including AfroIntroductions.com and BrazilCupid.com.

ChinaLoveCupid is in English, and focused on Western men looking to meet actual women who live in China. The site has over one million members and offers chat, email, video and instant messaging. Prospective users can browse their matches for free.

Read the full review here or go to ChinaLoveCupid.com here.

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2. Jiayuan.com

This is the largest dating site in China. Founded in 2003 by a Shanghai journalism student, today Jiayuan is the most popular dating site in China, and one of the busiest sites on the entire web.

Jiayuan is written in Chinese. If you only speak English, you can still use the site, but you’ll need to use a translator program of some sort. Most web browsers will translate the site for you, and there are many free programs you can use to translate private messages.

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3. DateinAsia.com

This is another popular site, with plenty of free options to explore. Note that this site is focused on the entire continent of Asia. If you’re looking for Chinese women exclusively, you’ll have to adjust the search settings. Even then, you might have to search through profiles which you’ll have no interest in.

While the goal here is a long-term, intimate relationship, it’s important to not rush in to any face-to-face meetings. China is notoriously difficult for even experienced travelers. There are cultural, bureaucratic and even geographic barriers which travelers must be prepared to navigate. For this reason, we recommend you develop a solid, substantive relationship online before you move forward with any travel.

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Understanding Chinese Women

While everybody is a unique individual, there are certain cultural differences you should be aware of. Without an understanding of how a Chinese woman is inclined to act in certain situations, communication can be hampered. So, with the caveat that these traits won’t apply to every person, here’s an overview of some common qualities associated with Chinese women.

Practicality – Many Chinese women are very frugal. The stereotype that Chinese women are only interested in a Western man’s money is simply untrue. You’ll likely be the one who will want to stay in the nicer hotels and eat at the fancier restaurants.

Many Chinese people have most of their money in savings, not material goods. This certainly doesn’t mean Chinese women are only attracted to Western men who have a lot of money. Rather, it means Chinese women aren’t particularly comfortable with living a very lavish lifestyle. Even if you’re a man of modest means you can still find great success in relationships with Chinese women.

Loyal – Chinese women are traditionally very loyal to their husbands and boyfriends. If you’re not aware of this, it can be a bit surprising. Your Chinese companion might fawn over you, adjusting your clothes, fixing your hair and otherwise engaging in routine maintenance.

Additionally, don’t be surprised if your Chinese girlfriend will spontaneously make you a meal or bring you a drink. Cooking is a big part of Chinese culture, and traditionally the women do most of it.

Direct – Chinese women have a great sense of humor, but it is different from a typical Western woman. Chinese women can be very blunt. Their sense of humor is typically very dry and understated.

For the initial meetings, it may seem as if any jokes you make are falling flat. In reality, Chinese women can be very reserved, especially when it comes to laughing and joking around. Don’t worry – what can seem like standoffishness is usually just a shy, more demure personality. Most Chinese women become more out-going around you as they get to know you better.

What Chinese Women are Looking For

There are several general conclusions about what Chinese women are looking for in a Western man. First and foremost, they want a man who is nice and who will treat them well. A kind heart is more important than looks or financial success.

Next, Chinese women look for a family man. This doesn’t necessarily mean you must plan on having children, but most Chinese women are certainly interested in starting a family. Also, Chinese women tend to gravitate towards family in general. If you have a large extended family, many Chinese women will find that comfortable and familiar.

Finally, Chinese women are interested in a man who is financially and socially responsible. As covered above, this doesn’t mean the man has to be a multimillionaire. Rather, Chinese women just want a man with a steady income who doesn’t make foolish financial decisions.

Socially, they want a man who is active in his community. Your specific political affiliations aren’t particularly important, just that you’re a charitable, reasonably active member of your community. Related to this, you pretty much want to avoid discussing political issues in general, and the Chinese government in particular. There’s really no guarantee your online communications, even via a dating site, aren’t being monitored in some fashion by the government. It’s best to just avoid any even vaguely political topics.

Benefits of Preparation

By taking a little time to learn about Chinese culture, and Chinese women, you can find great success developing a romantic relationship. But don’t worry too much. Chinese women who are looking to meet Western men certainly understand that there is going to be some cultural confusion, especially at first.

When you first meet a woman online, take it slow and just be yourself. Fairly early on you want to ask questions about what the woman wants out of life. Is she interested in starting a family? Is she open to the possibility of moving to another country? What sort of traits does she look for in a man, and what are her values in general?

The reason you ask these types of questions is because you want to quickly establish some mutual values and goals, or else you’re both just wasting your time. China is, obviously, a very large country and the potential dating pool of Chinese women is vast. With an online dating service, you can potentially meet a lot of women in a short period of time.

Finding Your Perfect Match

Of course, the best way to find a compatible partner is to have a clear understanding of what you want. You might want to actually sit down and make a list. Do you want children? How soon would you want to marry? What personality traits do you like in a partner, and what traits do you want to avoid?

Many Western men have found wonderful Chinese brides, and you can, too. Chinese women are intelligent, loyal, quick-witted and beautiful. Even better, there are many, many woman in China who want to meet, date and fall in love with a Western man. With just a little bit of preparation, you can meet the Chinese girl of your dreams.

Some Key Questions to Ask

There are four key cultural issues which you should address as soon as you can. These will be typical barriers which you should be prepared to deal with. These aren’t really subjects you bring up initially. Rather, these are topics to discuss once a romance has begun to develop, after both you and her have established you wish to pursue a relationship. The four issues are:

1. Will her parents allow her to marry you? Will they accept you as a member of their family? Chinese nationals have varying opinions of foreigners. Some families will forbid it outright. Others will have no problem. There is really no specific rule here – it really depends on the individual family.

(Note: the term “laowai” might sound familiar. It’s a Mandarin word which means foreigner. While it’s not a hardcore swear word, it’s also not typically used in polite conversation. Try to avoid using the word yourself, especially with strangers.)

2. Is she interested in leaving China and living in another country? The chances of you being able to move to China are incredibly remote, since China doesn’t take in many immigrants. In order to actually have a long, meaningful relationship, you’ll have to only consider women who are willing to move to you.

3. Are her parents currently trying to arrange a marriage for her? This can be common in China, and can mean a number of things. If the woman is already arranged to be married, you probably don’t have much of a chance with her. There can be some situations where you’ll be able to provide a better life than the current future husband, and the family might choose you instead.

If the parents are trying to arrange a marriage, but haven’t found a suitable candidate, you might be in luck. Your suitability in their eyes will probably depend a lot on their opinion of foreigners marrying into their family. Still, if the family likes you, developing a relationship is a lot easier.

4. What are her life goals? You might be surprised. Relative to Western women, you’re far more likely to hear that a Chinese woman has a goal of getting married. Regardless, you want to know her overall life goals, so you can see if they’re compatible with your own.

Additional Topics You’ll Want to Discuss

There are all sorts of additional questions you can ask as you’re developing a relationship. Online communication is a great way to get to know someone. With messages, you can think about what you want to say beforehand. Once a comfort level is established, you may prefer video messages or chat. Many dating services offer all three forms of communication.

Don’t be shy to ask for additional photos. Be wary of any photos which appear Photoshopped or otherwise look a little too perfect. Of course, you should be prepared to reciprocate with photos of your own.

Ask her what she likes to do in her spare time. What does she do on the weekend with her friends? What is her hometown like?

Food can be a popular topic, too. Ask her what types of food she enjoys cooking for herself, and what foods she enjoys cooking for others. (This will often be two different answers.)

Finally, ask her about her experience dating foreigners. Has she dated a man from a Western country before? While obviously her past is her business, it can be useful to know her overall experience with other cultures.

Dating a Chinese woman can be a wonderful experience. Today, technology allows people from all over the world to meet. If you’re interested in meeting a Chinese woman, you don’t have to have movie star looks or a big bank account. You simply need to be a warm, genuine person with a willingness to learn about Chinese culture. With these simple tips, you can go online today and start meeting women soon. Love might be just a click away.


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